Father, is it good for a woman who is not lawfully married both traditionally and otherwise [to ]have the children baptized?
Baptism in the Catholic Church is determined by two two entities: the Church and the individual to be baptized, in faith.
The Church because Christ Jesus gave her the authority to baptize all and such all includes infants and succlings, young and old, male and female ( cf. Matthew 28:19-20).
The individual because such has the free will, to choose good or bad, do good or bad.
The church also entails both the authorities(elders) of the church, in the words of St. James and the parent(s)/ custodian of the catechumen. A Catechumen is the candidate to be baptised.
In the case of infants, they are baptized on the faith of the parents who are members of the church. So, the parents share in the faith of the church and they are the ones to first teach their children the ways of the Lord. This makes that the family is the local church, in the same way the family is basic cell of the society . When we “Train up a child in the way he/she should go, and even when he or she is old, such will not depart from it (Proverbs 22:6).
This is why the Canon Law states that for infants to be baptized licit (Can. 868 §1), that:
1/ the parents or at least one of them or the person who legitimately takes their place must consent;
2/there must be a founded hope that the infant will be brought up in the Catholic faith; if such hope is altogether lacking, the baptism is to be delayed according to the prescripts of particular law after the parents have been advised about the reason.
Altogether, this means that wedding is not the criteria for infant baptism but the faith and consent of the parents or custodian standing lawfully in place of the parents. Parent(s) here could be either mother or father or both.
But, if the parent(s), etc, are (is ) not going to grow up the child in the christian way, it’s not advisable or good to get such a child baptized until such reason is surmounted or until the child comes of age of reasoning in order to decide for himself or herself.
Therefore, in the Catholic Church, a christian woman who is not lawfully married both traditionally or in a Christian way could still get the child baptized.
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©Fr. Henry Charles Umelechi
Also read: Not grace(favor) alone but also hard work